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Love Advice Forum Thread: Don't love wife anymore

  1. #1
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    Don't love wife anymore

    What should I do? I don't love my wife anymore but I also don't want to get a divorce. We don't really fight or anything, there is just nothing there.... no spark, no nothing

  2. #2
    Senior Member mommymumbles's Avatar
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    I am so sorry for you both. Have you spoken with your wife about your feelings? If not, that might be the place to start. Do you know how she is feeling towards you? Maybe she has similar feelings. Then again, maybe not? How long have you been married? Maybe you could go to counseling together.

    It is hard when we here do not really know much of what is going on. Have you met someone else, or are you just completely unhappy with your marriage and see no hope for it? You say you do not want to get a divorce, so does that mean you would like to work on it and save it?

    Talk with your wife. You owe it to yourself and to her. You both deserve to be happy, and just living day -to -day and getting by is not happy.

    I wish you lots of good luck!

  3. #3
    Senior Member Lucky120's Avatar
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    I am so sorry have you talked to her about how you feel? Maybe you need to try a second honeymoon or something, sometimes the little things can bring back that spark. You should at least try especially if you say you do not want to get a divorce. If you have no love for her anymore then that is what you will have to do, because I am sure she does not want to stay in a loveless marriage. Please make sure that you talk to her and see her view before you do anything and waive all of your options. Some couples have this problem and they never address it, so it gets worse and worse. I pray for you and hope for the best, but try that new honeymoon or date that may just do it. Remember to point out why you are unhappy and see if that works as well. Good luck and hope everything works out for the best.

  4. #4
    Senior Member M.H.West's Avatar
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    Dude! And why are you not making the sparks anymore? Marriage takes time, effort and lots of work. You can't just sit back for the ride or it will get boring after awhile. Try to remember what made you fall in love with her in the first place. Or better yet just try new things! Put the jumper cables back on that relationship and crank the engine baby! You will be surprised at what you might find!

  5. #5
    Member Catnap's Avatar
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    I think most marriages go through this sooner or later. You need to try to reignite the spark yourself before you do anything else. Marriage isn't all lovey dovey happy times. Like any relationship, it takes work, and when you live with someone it can be very easy to become bored and get stuck in a rut. Get out and do things together, go on dates and do whatever it is you used to enjoy doing together.

    If that doesn't work, then I do agree you should talk to her, but probably you shouldn't mention that you don't love her right away as that will just hurt her and drive a wedge between the two of you that may be irreparable.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Don Quixote's Avatar
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    Come now, you don't really expect the sun to start shining and the birds to start singing everytime you look at each other, do you? You don't have to be in love to be married to each other. Unless you are looking for an excuse to get out of the marriage.

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    Get up and get going man! I mean get going to a marriage counselor. Work at it! This is not a TV show where you get bored and turn the channel.

  8. #8
    Senior Member summerRain's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kutlut View Post
    What should I do? I don't love my wife anymore but I also don't want to get a divorce. We don't really fight or anything, there is just nothing there.... no spark, no nothing
    Hey, you can't get everything that you wanted. If you are sure that you don't love your wife anymore and you are not telling it to her just because you don't wanna have a divorce, you are being so unfair! Be a man. Decide now. Don't be afraid on all the consequences that you might get.

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    Marriege is something you have to work at all the time. Have you decided to move on with your life because you guys don't agree on everything? Or your moving on because the spark has flizzled down to a light glow? Try to find new and exciting things you both agree on. Have you thought about renewing your vows? Take a second honeymoon? Their are tons of ways to get the spark back. But must importantly, work at it!

  10. #10
    Senior Member zaerine's Avatar
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    Sad to know that but at least you do not want a divorce so better try the marriage to work. Maybe try marriage counseling, try dating again and have that spark you had in the relationship before. Try to spend more time together maybe going to a second honeymoon or a very relaxing vacation together. Hope it will bring back the feelings again.

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