Love Advice Forum Thread: how do I get my wife interested in a threesome?

As you are married, you have to ask yourself why you feel the need to bring someone into your marriage bed. This is obviously important to you but she is not feeling it. If she doesn't change her mind what will you do? You say it's boring, but ask yourself what alternatives you have to spicing things up? I mean aside from wanting a threesome? Often these situations never turn out the way intended. Someone may become attached. What if the wife agrees and decides she wants to be just with the other person? Ask yourself is this worth the risk merely for spice.

Maybe you don't understand that marriege is bewteen two people not three or four people. Threesomes never turn out the way they were supposed to be. As Nene5 has mentioned one person makes the situtation more "intersting".
If your wife is like 95% of the American women population, we don't like that kind of stuff and don't want to be involved with it. And having our hubsands push us in to it will only make matters worse (fighting about it, not wanting sex anymore, and avoiding each other all together).
Have you asked your wife what "spice" in a sexual relationship means to her? Have you thought about what "spice" means to you? Are both of you so tried that sex is the last thing on your mind? Maybe its boring to you because one of you is intersted in sex and the other is not? Or maybe its boring because one of you is putting forth effort and the other one is not?

Are you talking a threesome with another man or another woman? Not that it matters.

There is absolutely nothing my husband could do to persuade me to have a threesome. I don't think most women are emotionally wired to handle something like that, especially when in a committed relationship. And honestly, I know that is a big fantasy for most men, but if my husband were to actually suggest it because he felt our sex life was boring, I would be insulted and our sex life would probably be nonexistant for a long time after that.

You know, you cannot spice up a relationship by putting it into ruin. It’s baffling how you would like your wife to have sex with another person while other people would kill finding their partner in another man’s arm. Or maybe she’s not to land in another man’s arms but another woman will have to land into yours. It’s no less than cheating and worst, a blow knocked right into her face. Threesome isn’t an answer if you are bored with your sex life. There are other means. Don’t recourse on adding another woman in your bed for your own convenience. Maybe that’s what makes her lose interest with sex in the first place.

There are several ways you can go about getting your wife interested in a threesome but you first have to ask yourself, is this what your marriage needs? It can be a slippery slope. If your sex life is already sub-par, a threesome might have you contemplating the greener grass. If the experience is fun and enjoyable and everything you expected, you might begin to think you are missing something that your wife cannot provide (which most often is not the case). Think about how your sex life got to this point and work on ways to spice it up before bringing in a third party.

Consider some of these options:

*Role Play (naughty nurse, dirty doctor, or whatever floats your boat)
*Erotic movies
*New positions or different parts of the house
*Spontaneity
*Love toys
*Travel
*Good old fashioned romance

A threesome should enhance an already adventurous love life, not revive a stale one.

If she is not interested then I think you should drop it. If you were to pressure her to the point she finally gives in, then chances are great she will resent you very much later on. Plus, it sounds like you just want a relationship with another woman and this is how you are trying to go about it. If you really want to spice things up, there are many other things to try, like other posters have mentioned already.

I hope you listen to your wife and respect her wishes.

You have got to be kidding! A marriage is a threesome already - husband, wife and your higher authority. Does your wife know that you are asking this question on a forum? Just that alone is going to freak her out.

Originally Posted by susansboneyard

You have got to be kidding! A marriage is a threesome already - husband, wife and your higher authority. Does your wife know that you are asking this question on a forum? Just that alone is going to freak her out.

lol, there is no higher authority (which since I was asking for a 3some is probably obvious I don't believe in one)