Discussion in 'Relationship Questions' started by ThisGirl 231, Oct 29, 2017.

  1. ThisGirl 231

    ThisGirl 231 New Member

    I have been in a relationship for about 1.5 years. I have had so many doubts about it. My most recent ones are as follows and any advice would be greatly appreciated. He's about 4 years younger, I'm 27. I have a good job and am mostly happy with where my life is. Recently i had a pregnancy scare, i thought my birth control failed but turns out I'm not pregnant. My doubts started there. I'm with a person that i cannot depend on financially. He has no job and he has shown no desire to get a job anytime soon. He worked before but all of a sudden stopped and i do not know why. I have never met his family, he says he's afraid of them asking questions and being too up in his business. He never takes me around his friends, well he did introduce me to his friend once and after that i never heard about that friend again. We only see each other once a week because he's living at home with his family so i can't be over when his mom is there. I'm 27 years old! I'm not in high school is what i say but that's just the wat it is. With my work schedule i can only see him Sunday morning so that's the only day we hang out. I have tried telling him that if he wants to talk to other girls or hang out with other girls then we can end things but he says no because I'm the only one he wants to be with. I believe he's faithful but i can't be sure. I have strong feelings for him but i also know that i deserve someone who is happy and not afraid to show me off to family and friends. I want to be with someone who has goals. I don't want him to be a millionaire but at least do something. My family doesn't even know I'm dating him. First of all because they're very religious and would not accept him not being from the same religion. Secondly because I'm too embarrassed to bring him around. They always saw better for me and so did i. I know i may sound superficial. So do i need to end things because i have doubts or stick around and give him more time to decide what to do with his life? I know some people take longer to decide than others but from what i see in him, he's fine just living the way he is for as long as possible. I just want someone to put in some effort. I just know that it's gonna be very difficult to let it all go if we end things. I'm the one who will probably go to him first. I'm not an outgoing person so maybe that's why i hold on to him, the next person may come in a few years or never come at all.
  2. Unnaturalthings

    Unnaturalthings Active Member

    Oh wow. There are a lot of serious issues here between you two. There are so many holes here. I don't see any real compatibility between you two or the way you want a relationship to function.

    You are 27 years old. You are simultaneously too old and too young to be in a relationship like this. Too old for this because you are a grown woman and both of you feel the need to hide your relationship from each other's families. He lives at home and refuses to work. He is a boy in a man's body. You are also too young to stay because there are soooo many men out there that would make you a lot happier than you are now, and you have lots of time and opportunity to meet them.

    I could go on and on, but no.... I think you know what you need to do. Break ups are always hard and come with bumps, but is it REALLY gonna be that bad considering all the crap you're dealing with, and you only see him once a week anyways? One day you will look back on this and kick yourself for not leaving sooner, IMHO

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