Need advice with one night stand turned into dating

Discussion in 'Dating Advice' started by maia, Dec 27, 2017.

  1. maia

    maia New Member

    I recently moved to a new town and started graduate studies. One of the guys in my program started hitting on me the very first time we went out as a group and while I rejected him, he keep flirting and trying to get my attention in the following weeks. I was in a two year long distance relationship at the time but one night we started talking while tipsy and really connected and ended up having sex. I stayed over because he insisted and while I tried to leave as quickly as possible, he was very intense, cuddling me and kissing my face. We eventually hooked up again and it kept getting more intense, with us holding hands in public, going on dates and talking about things we wanted to do together. I usually stay over 5 nights a week though sometimes it is 4. Me and my exboyfriend broke up and from there it got even more serious, I already leave stuff at his place because he asked me to and we don't always have sex but cuddle all the time. Right before winter break, we vaguely talked about the fact that we have feelings and agreed on staying in contact while spending the holidays in out hometowns and so we have done. However, although he has hinted strongly that he considers us to be dating and that dating for him is exclusive, we haven't defined the relationship yet nor actually said direct things about how we feel about each other. We first hooked up on September 30 and I started staying over regularly after October 20. I don't know if I should asked him outright or just see where it goes. He has mentioned meeting my parents, and has compared himself to my ex boyfriends by saying that things that were problematic with them won't be with him. He also mentioned that he has shown my picture to his friends in his hometown and has at different times said we are a thing, that I'm his girl, and that I'm his lady.
  2. drsky

    drsky Member

    Dear Mala,

    The fact that you are both spending time, and that it is not just abt being physical, that he wants to meet your parents implies that it could be getting serious. How serious is the question? You can see just how and where it goes or you can just talk to hin openly
    if you want to hear from him. If he is a communicative and open person he may just tell you more abt harm in asking open ended questions NOW and THEN when in a good mood and at a right time(when he seems to be conversing abt you and him). May be not all at one depends how he is.

    Ask what he thinks abt this relationship?
    Where he sees this going and where he wants this to go?
    You can ask him abt his previous relationships or flings etc so you have an idea of what kind of person he is?
    where he wants to be in HIS LIFE(personal ) 5 or 10 years in time
    How his relationship is towards his friends and family colleauges

    this should give you a fair idea.

    To deepen your relationship and form good and sweet memories, do beautiful things together, going out for romantic dinners, outings, small trips or vacation, walk in the park, movies, theater, formal dance parties etc etc

    And pray to GoD daily(for GOD is love) and help couples and singles seeking love and marriage as much as possible, so that
    positive karma/action /energies will bring love into your life.

    Wish you the best,

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