Why can't I choose

Discussion in 'Introduce Yourself' started by Oliviamae, Jun 3, 2017.


Who would you choose

  1. Guy of 4 years

    0 vote(s)
  2. Guy never been relationship but strong connection for 7 years

    0 vote(s)
Multiple votes are allowed.
  1. Oliviamae

    Oliviamae New Member

    Ok I need help. I honestly feel guilty about ALL of this and it makes me go against all that I believe in. Ok well I been dating this guy for almost 4years. My two daughters 4&5 see him as their dad (their real dad passed years ago so they don't really know him). And he's honestly a GOOd man. Takes care of his responsibilities, makes sure we have everything, making plans as in building houses for us etc. he also has 5 other kids who live with us full time, and they see me as their mom as well. Well about couple weeks ago this guy messaged me. Now this guy me and him had history. He's someone where we ALWAYS had a strong connection with one another but it was never the right timing. We still feel this connection 7 years later, which is weird to me that we still have that strong feeling by the way. And me and my boyfriend I'm with now I feel like I'm settling with him and that I know he will always do us right and be good to us. But would you leave after being with him for almost 4 years for a guy you never had a relationship with but always had strong connection with for 7?? And the fact that the one I'm with currently I feel as if I bore him, or our connection is not so strong. But I would be heart broken to break his heart after all he does for us . I'm torn on what to do.
  2. Gregory

    Gregory New Member

    I think an important point might be, that you are speculating about what your bf feels. Do you fear he plans to leave you? (This would not make much sense if he plans your future together.) Ask yourself: What makes the connection to the other guy so special?/Why is the connection to your bf not so strong?/Can you two work on that? For example talk about if he really is bored?
    If it was never the right timing, you and the other guy probably are used to it -I don't mean that in a cynical way. He must see, that you are now in a relationship and you must well consider your decision. And if he is not willing to give you at least time for that, you have your answer.

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